Friday, March 30, 2012

Worf vs. Chewbacca



I really liked the premise of the T.V. show Deadliest Warrior.  But why let reality stop you?  I think there are some great "what if" battles lurking in the geeky realm of sci-fi and fantasy.  How cool would a Chewbacca and Worf fight be?  Pretty freakin' awesome.  So, here I present a fight between Worf and Chewbacca.

Background:
Worf:  Orphaned Klingon; member of a warrior culture.  He is dedicated to his people, even if they make him an official outcast from time to time.  Had a son with a woman, though he didn't find out about his son until a few days before his baby-mama was murdered.
Chewbacca:  He goes from being a preeminent member of Wookie society to being the wingman of a man who is in love with a woman who has a crush on her twin brother.  How the mighty have fallen.
Winner: Chewbacca has more to fight for

Attire:
Worf: Starfleet Uniform with an odd sash thingy.
Chewbacca:  Fur with an odd sash thingy.
Winner:  Tied

Weapons:
Worf:  Phaser
Chewbacca: Wookie bowcaster
Winner: Worf.  The phaser is smaller, yet quick and deadly.

Hand-to-hand Combat:
Worf: He's a warrior from a warrior society.  Practices in the holodeck everyday.
Chewbacca:  Spends his time in bars with his buddy Han Solo, who likes to get into barfights.  Wookies have also been known to rip people's limbs off.
Winner: Chewbacca would beat down the puny little Klingon.

Ships:
Worf:
Enterprise D:  Top speed of Warp 9.5; 42 decks; a crew of over 1,000;
10 phaser banks; 250 phton torpedoes; complex shield grid
Chewbacca:
Millennium Falcon:  Can do the Kessel Run in under 12 parsecs;
skeleton crew of 2; a handful of lasers; shields
Winner: Sorry Han, the Millennium Falcon might have been able to take out the (chronologically) original Enterprise under Archer, but that's about it.

Back-up:
Worf:

Chewbacca: 

Winner: Chewbacca.  If it came down to a battle of wits, Picard all the way.  But since this battle is coming down to fur and teeth, Han takes it all the way

Worf:  2
Chewie:  3
Tied: 1
Winner:  Chewie out-mans Worf and beats him down in one of the ultimate nerd match-ups.

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